Monday, March 16, 2009


By Roni Bell Sylvester

The first 16 years of my life, I herded, sorted, studied and milked dairy cows.
I was chased by un-merciful Holstein bulls.
And with green apples lured the masculine cow near enough the fence to allow a leap on her back for a three steps ride.
Dad called the masculine cow, "A worthless milker." For because her teats and udder were tiny, she couldn't pay her keep.
She was built and walked - like the bulls.
Friendly to humans, she was the herd's fun prankster .
Running parallel to my observations of this "tom boy" cow, there was the milkman's son.
Simply put, he was the human opposite of the masculine cow. He was built, walked, and looked like a feminine woman.
He'd giggle, smile, then disappear with a "certain" man in our church.
It was those combinations of observations that helped me arrive at my own take on genders.
Mom well taught, that each of us is God's child.
>From day one I learned God builds us male or female, with moles, flat footed, variable shades of skin or hair color, tall, short, left or right handed, fat, skinny, big boobed flat or barrel chested, floppy or deaf ears, blind or seeing eyes, dainty-massive-or missing hands.
And when I leaned towards making fun of someone because they were "different" than I (thought I) was, she'd tap me gently on the shoulder and whisper, "There by the grace of God go I."
Born with the genetic, chemical, cellular, electrical, molecular structures that settle the level of our male or femaleness, we come out of the womb not, as a chosen life style.
Growing into adulthood, we work on our thought processes, hopefully shaping the healthiest ways to use what we are given.
Here, one chooses to like dogs and despise marshmallows, slap little children and write love letters to Charlie Manson, spit out bacon and soak in alcohol, hate ourselves or not, love our neighbor or not.
We can shape our aura of influence in ways that deliver evil, slovenliness, shrieking judgments, and self indulgence. Or we can work on our thoughtfulness, honesty, consideration for others, and let God take care of the judging business. I know a lesbian couple who radiates nothing but the later, and heterosexual couples who crush on with the former.
Never once has either lesbian ridiculed or threatened my life for being a heterosexual.
Once again. It's behavior...a person chooses.
When was the last time you heard someone brag, "Yup! I chose this big honker of a nose! I went to a honker store, and there it was. Big as a Canadian goose right by the checkout stand! Ain't it great!"
Whether homosexuals or heterosexuals, I personally do not care for public scenes of slop over smooching and crude sexual displays. Ruins my view shed, and makes me long for the day when Mom walked into Paul's Drugstore and discreetly asked the cashier to, "please lower that magazine so young eyes can't see it."
Her request was honored, no headlines, courts, ACLU, or Bill Maher sneers ensued.
What consenting adults do in privacy is none of anyone's business. Unless of course they do harm to another thusly making it the public's business.
I assume that by now a few of you reading this will start choosing to hate me for my observations on homosexuals.
So be it.
My views started at an early age, only to be confirmed time and time again throughout my 64 years of life.
Understanding these givens, has helped me make the decision to use my time and energy working on my behavior, instead of meddling with either God's makings.or judgments.
Having established my basis for what I believe constitutes a homosexual, let me march into my take regards request by some homosexuals to use the term "marriage," as the descriptive for their partnering.
The term marriage is biblical born, just as absolute as one is born to what degree they are male or female. Remember? We covered that already.
The genesis of the word marriage comes out of religious books.
Regardless the religion, all recognize marriage as a union between man and woman.
To change this, one would have plunge into the process of completely re-writing the Bible, Torah and more.
Couldn't homosexuals in want of this make better use of their time lobbying ecumenical counsels instead of courts?
Imagine. Rabbi's, Priests, Ministers, Pastors, Prophets, Fathers, all gathering to rewrite ancient religious teachings, in order to accommodate today's homosexuals in want. And why would anyone deliberately drag church/temple dealings into state matters?
But in all fairness, if enough - including God - wanted this change, who am I to object?
My suggestion would be that instead of destroying these historical religious structures, those in want could create their own new definition of their partnerships.
I remember a woman, who belonged to a golf club originally formed by men (who later allowed wives in), sued for the men's tee times. I thought her action to be exceptionally rude. For after all, the men didn't have to allow women in - in the first place.
Thereon, I lumped her together with the many conceited, ugly ones in our culture who, instead of "building what they want," go out and destroy that which others have built.
A reality alert to homosexuals. Well OK. Heterosexuals too.
If you want to use the term marriage. because of any perks you think you'll receive from it.let me give you one example why that's a bad idea: Signing a joint income tax return! It isn't all that it's cracked up to be! For what little gain one thinks they might receive, one teensy whoops by one past or present spouse on that return, and an I.R.S agent will subject you as an individual, to guaranteed pain for the rest of your individual life that will make finger nail pulling seem like a gentle massage.
Wanting to end this but not knowing how, I re-read and re-read, until finding that Mom said it all, in her beautiful, simple reasoning, "There by the grace of God, go I."
March 4, 2009


in behalf of author said...

I loved this Roni - you reflected my feelings on this subject almost perfectly.
I thought I was alone..glad to know I'm not.
You've spent some time writing the last few days - sharing your life with us is a lovely privilege I cherish.

in behalf of author said...

Dear Roni

I just had to send you a short email to let you know that I am with you and your blessed mum on the subject of people. I have several friends that are homosexual, not by choice, but by what there brain tells them. Believe me, they would not choose to be that way, if they could. Why any one in their right mind would want to go down that path willingly is not open for discussion. No one in their right mind would want to be the subject of scorn and ridicule. The tears that they have shed through the years would fill the oceans many times over.
Your mother was wise beyond her years and the times that she was born into.
God has made each one of us according to his own likeness and I think that God would have been awfully bored if he made each one of us exact duplicates of each other.
I also believe that we come to this earth again, many times over. Some call it reincarnation. I have no name for it but I am glad that God has made this wonderful world for us to enjoy and play in.
Scientist are now on the verge of discovering that there are parallel worlds and other dimensions. That we could possibility be living in several different worlds at once. There is so much that we do not know. We may not know why one person chooses one sex over another, but they do and we must respect their decisions and welcome them for what they are. Humans with the greatest potential to accomplish anything they want in life.
Therefore, amen to your coming out and telling how you feel about such an important subject!
I also wanted to tell you that several days ago you sent me an email that had Blogs March 2 headline. I like to read what you post because I find so many different things. This time, one of the links was to a survival website that was so interesting. I really enjoyed reading about how they where explaining the pros and cons of different machinist tools. What an interesting life you have! Thank you for sharing it with us!